Queen of the Night

A lot of spiritual traditions work with the quiet energy and the magic of the night. Many eastern traditions with Yogi’s especially have extensive secret teachings to be practiced at night. There is something about being alone in the night doing something while a part of the world or your immediate surroundings are asleep.

Anyway this last year was quite a rough year; a lot of things were to be sorted out when it came to my family’s immediate financial security. I lacked all space to think about my own business, spiritual practice and many other things otherwise important me and I was forced to reexamine my faith and trust in the bond with my Guru.

It wasn’t so much that I didn’t trust, just that the fear of not having enough money for my house, family, clothes, food – basic amenities – was too large (hahaha who am I kidding that’s exactly what a lack of faith looks like). Whether I really was in danger is doubtful but the turning point where I needed to act and take charge to find a job and make us a living together with what my husband already earned was to me the most immediate necessity.

Now I am excellent when in dire straits because that’s when my survival skills and my no-nonsense attitude kicks in. The feeling that I can do any job and am not above any work has always helped me get a job fast. So when In august I finally understood the need for me to get a job fast (our financial reserves almost depleted) I did a round past all job agencies as they can be your best advocate as they already can asses what kind of person you are and do a fairly good estimation of both your character and your work ethics. So I was approached for a job….

There was just one hitch it was a night job, part time, with a very good schedule leaving me lot’s of time for my own business, the volunteering I do for two foundations and for family and friends. Not very well paid but better than drawing from my own savings. I am very honest when I say I wasn’t very thrilled at the prospect of doing a night job as I love sleeping and I had noticed that without a strict job and schedule in my own business I chose my own working hours, I maybe slept a tat bit more than was good for me. On top of that in the wake of my troubles the sleeping was a way to avoid the world just a little bit longer, just a few more minutes at a time. I was in flight mode and the sleeping was a sound escape.

The funny thing is that for years my guru had been telling me that I could do with a great deal less sleep than the average person and I would fare well by it too. So when I called up to let him know I was up for a job interview as a planner in the night his voice changed immediately. Like he was more attentive, he tuned into me and my Karma and to what I was saying,…He asked me a couple of questions to asses the work and than told me I should take it as it would be good for me, being part time and having still time to work for his foundation here in the Netherlands etc., etc.

So I went to the interview got accepted and started a grueling training schedule for about three months.. Doing 4 nights on and 3 off and than again 4 on 3 off etc., until my training period was over. My once so comfortable life had seized to exist. I was tired, tired once again tired and broken. I had no time to overthink certain areas of my life and the event that had led up to this necessity to look for a job, really I was just getting by as I slept way way, way less than the normal 7-8 hours a night. But I also had no time to be sour, angry, bitter etc., etc., which was good as the danger of those emotions I fear more.

But after the training period the schedule became 3 nights on, 6 nights off and it was like a whole new world for me, I had time, time, time and energy and I managed to get work done at night and simply do more. I am only slowly seeing the benefits it has on the amount of work I get done now. I can now truly say to my teacher that he is right (of course).

Now working for one of the largest Dutch Undertakers & insurers my teacher easily made the link to the Dakinis and Yoginis practicing on the cremation grounds making the best of the nature of reality being transitory and not fixed helping them transform their ordinary minds into extraordinary minds.

A giggle escapes me when I make the secret comparison of me with a yogini on the churning grounds with nothing else to cover her than a tiger skin to show her mastery over her mind having no more discursive thoughts void of attachment and grasping.

Well I am definitely not that but the night hours help with getting things done and also the undertaker part truly helps to see the transitory nature of life as people of all walks and ages die. We never quite now where I am sending our teams to and the stories are always touching and meaningful. At night I feel everything is somehow more in my reach more than by day….. and somehow rather I can picture my teacher with a huge smile and an eye wink mouthing “I told you so!!!”

Here a greeting from Nepal from me – Radia, The Unusual Yogini (aka Queen of the night)